Things fell apart...

It seems as if some will discredit my choice to leave the Christian Faith because I have experienced church hurt - but would you second-guess my choice to not play rugby anymore because I got a grievous head injury?

If you are informed of the impact that an injury would have physically, it shouldn't be hard to understand why mental abuse and damage could produce the same level of impact on one's emotional and social functioning. 

Imagine being a part of a team that is supposed to champion a great course conceptually but in action it does the opposite, especially when it counts the most. That's how I feel about MY experience of faith. 

I do not intend to project my experience of faith onto others as I know faith works really well for some people, but I feel a deep conviction to share my perspective. 

 I've heard stories of people mistreated in safe spaces such as the Church and unfortunately I have too. I have definitely experienced more than just hurt and love from individuals who believe in God but overall there are huge problems within religious communities.

I have never been satisified by many teachings though I dedicated years of my love genuinely TRYING to uphold them but over and over I failed - despite doing everything I was advised to by my counsel and the bible. 

It's no secret that I have been hurt, but rather than attributing the change of my faith to mere hurt, why not try and dive deeper? 

I trusted over and over so many Christian authorities and people  who when it counted didn't love me  and it's only the minority that I feel have loved me through my disbelief (special mention to Faith and Callum Jaye.)

The truth of the matter is that I would have never wanted to lose my faith but so many significant gaps and misinformation have come to my attention and I can't ignore these. 

Of course - there is so much beauty to religion and in the Christian Faith but I ought to honour my journey of authentic healing, lest I become wilfully complacent in what I believe.




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