FOMO - THE IRRATIONAL FEAR OF MISSING OUT

 I am the epitome of a social butterfly and I still ferociously battle with the fear of missing out. As I write I’m missing the birthday jam of a very loved one by reason on honing in on our house search. Though I decided that I wouldn’t attend the party, I continued to feel several tugs towards London where this party was taking place. Music, people I love, vibes and dancing. What more would I want? It felt like me declining this one invitation was the equivalent to the world ending. That I might miss out on a once in a lifetime opportunity and even more so I may lose my close friend.  That thinking was obviously quite irrational. And that is the point: fear is often irrational.


My intention when writing this is not to annihilate the existence of FOMO, it’s to remind myself and you that we do have the ability to combat it.  The truth of the matter is that attending an event just on the basis of FOMO, is an extreme misuse of your time and energy. Though said event could be great, have you harnessed your workload? In simple words, is your room tidy, have you eaten adequately or are you feeling grounded within yourself. It’s crazy how engaging in the practice of asking ourselves questions can direct us away from fear and to a place of stability. 


Even more so the exercise of journaling about our inner thoughts can be really useful when it comes to processing our emotions. I know for example that I struggle with guilt and shame for not attending an event I’d like to. For example, I couldn’t justify spending money on petrol, doing a 2 hour journey with my newborn and exerting a lot of energy on packing. In ignorance of the overall trade-off that I would have to make to go to this event, guilt and shame directed to me the fear of man. That perhaps my friend may think I don’t care about her or that I have a terrible life because I’m struggling with finances.


No no no no. That’s a dangerous climate to sit in.


The next time FOMO strikes, slow down and assess. It’s likely that your emotions are in control to the detriment of your rationality. It means rather than seeing reality you are engaging with something that may not be real. Perhaps your friend will completely understand that you can’t make it for whatever reason (then if they don’t you’ve either not communicated sufficiently or they are not willing to understand you).

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